It's A New Day

My husband, K had the week off, which was awesome. He hasn't had the opportunity to have a vacation, nor could we afford one, let alone just pick up and go. Which means that he hasn't had time off since Big C was born. It's difficult enough for him to be gone 14 hours a day and get home just as it's time for Big C to go to bed. Needless to say, that doesn't leave much time for bonding. Well, this week has been wonderful for that. So much so that I noticed Big C even preferring to be with K over me! No, that doesn't upset me. His daddy is providing him what he needs. Personally, I think it's because K can lift him high up in the air and do reps with him. I just can't do that....that boy weighs 26 and a half pounds. Yes, I'm a weakling.

It has just been the best week ever. I absolutely *love* watching my husband hold, play, feed, change and read to him, among shushing him to lull him to sleep at night. I don't know about you, but it just makes me fall in love with him all over again. At that moment, he is the sexiest man alive and irresistible and I feel so Blessed to be married to him. I can't explain it. But your child(ren) are the most important thing in life to you and it's just overwhelmingly (is that a word?) awesome to see the person you vowed to spend the rest of your life with, to make babies with and to part only when the Lord above says it's time, love and be just as nuts about them as you are.

It's Tuesday, and he's back to work. I was dreading it, not wanting him to go and it's sucks that I'm home alone with Big C today. But at the same time it was kind of nice too. Big C and I were able to go back and have our quiet morning Mommy and Son time, which I cherish since he's more of a morning person and very smiley in the am. I'm also amazed because he has been playing quietly in his playpen while I did some cleaning up (bottles don't wash themselves you know) and sat down to write this quickly. I think it's the new toy we bought him yesterday. He's been batting it around in there because I hear the music going off.

On the pregnancy front, I had my second appointment with the OB last Monday, the 31st. I was 10W 4D preggo and the doctor was hoping we would be luck enough to hear the heartbeat. But nothing. He thought he heard something but unless it's clear enough for me to hear it too then it's a no dice. He was nice enough to offer to send me for a sonogram if I was worried, or if I was comfortable with waiting another 4 weeks we could try the Doppler again. If you knew me, then you'd know I would jump at the chance for the sonogram so I could have peace of mind. But, I didn't this time. The doctor said everything seemed to be going well, my uterus was growing, which meant baby was growing. So I opted to wait. What the heck was I thinking?!? I have been driving myself batty every few days thinking about it. I'm such a worry wart, I just can't help it. I'm just saying positive. There is a reason my doctor told me when I was pregnant with Big C, "Don't watch those TV shows and don't read things online. Only read the book we give you. That has everything you need to know in it. The stuff they show on TV needs to have drama value and they usually pick the more traumatic which is not a reflection of the whole." OK, how can you *not* read other stuff or watch those shows about babies being born on TV? It's so hard! On the other hand, when you are a nervous wreck because the person on the TV show has talked about her 3 miscarriages, or the person online is talking about their stillborn birth you wish you would have listened to the doctor. So take it from me, a hormonal, emotional naturally worrisome when not pregnant woman. Don't watch or read that stuff!

Other than that, I've been sleeping terribly lately. I was told to thank my hormones for that. I'm still very tired too. That should be subsiding soon, as should the morning sickness. Which I have to say, hasn't been too bad the last few days. I can feel my rings getting a bit tighter too. And some of the lower back pain has started, but it's not too bad right now. So far so good. I'm looking forward to my next appointment which will be the end of this month. We should hear the heartbeat then since I'll be 14 weeks. That will make me feel much better. :-)

-MoM-